Leaving A Toxic Environment

Last week I met with one of our newer practitioners, whom we'll refer to as Jane, who then related a personal conversation they had with their supervisor. The succinct version of the interaction was that after many years upon being transferred to a new project, the supervisor mentioned to Jane was that she was taking more sick time on this new team than she had previously with her former team. The supervisor was not upset but merely making an observation, as Jane has plenty of 'sick time'. 

Even though there was no ill-intent on the supervisors part this still caused Jane to pause.

Had she taken more sick time than usual?

Reflecting on the transfer more mindfully, Jane knew that she would be going from a high stress project to one with little to no stress. But what she did not realize were the mental and physical changes that were going to transpire as a result.

After about a month into the new project Janes mind and body felt 'different'. And this new feeling felt 'odd' and 'uncomfortable' so like anyone she made an appointment with her physician to see if there was anything wrong. After all of the testing, the doctor gave her the good news that all of the results were normal.

This was certainly good news but it did not explain how she was feeling. 

It was not until our weekly meeting that the veil of uncertainty was lifted.

After many years, her mind and body were detoxifying from undue mental stress and she was returning to a more relaxed state of existence.

As we explored more of this new state of balance I made the comparison to someone being severely injured and not knowing about the injury until the situation calmed down. Janes situation was much the same. She did not realize her mind and body were injured until the situation changed for the better. It was akin to her living in a continuous 'fight' mode before to now one where the threat had diminished. 

The 'fight' mode she had been living in, no matter how harmful, had become comfortable.

These same heightened mental and physical responses can happen to anyone, and oftentimes as in Janes example, it was unrealized. 

Some occupations that come to mind are police, firemen, and doctors, but as in Janes case she was not in any of these career fields, she works in a office setting.

But occupations are not the only situations where someone may experience significant stress. 

Consider the spouse or significant other who is in an abusive relationship. 

Or those that have experienced a sexual assault. 

Or someone addicted to alcohol or drugs. 

Or the child who gets bullied at school or even at home. 

Doctors may or may not be trained to ask all types of personal questions so that is where a dedicated mindfulness meditation practice come in. 

Mindfulness and meditation allows one to be aware of even the most minutest of changes in both mind and body. After sufficient skill development a mindfulness practitioner will recognize the agitation, explore it more deeply, and then send it on its way.

Jane continues to meet with me in both one-on-one settings as well as individual meetings and she has progressed very nicely in that time.

Sathu. Sathu. Sathu.

Educate Your Mind With The Dharma.
 
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Vladimir warmly and skillfully passes on the Buddhas Dharma to a world in need of loving-kindness, compassion, and empathy for the benefit of all living beings.
 
To learn more about us and for free mindfulness and mediation resources you are warmly invited to visit: www.bluelotusmeditation.us
 
Looking for a way to help guide others? Become a Blue Lotus Aspirant here: https://bluelotusmeditation.us/continue-your-journey
 
US Tax deductible donations may be offered here: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=88BRNH3K7Y7FQ
 
Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a 501(c)(3) Buddhist society.

On Being 'Insert Emotion Here'.

When we experience an emotion we typically say 'I am angry' or 'I am sad'...or I am whatever emotion is being experienced at the time.

'I am' described a quality that something possesses as part of it's characteristics. For example, a Red Delicious apple will always be red. It will never be orange or yellow. It's coloring will never change. 

Your emotions, on the other hand, will.

You are not always angry, happy, sad, or melancholy. In fact, on any given day you may experience all of these emotions for different lengths of time and even intensities.

A monk best described emotions to me as this: emotions are like tools in a tool box. You only use the right tool for the right job and when you're finished you put the tool back.

Too often we allow ourselves to carry an emotion for far too long. The longer we carry it, the less useful it is. This not only applies to the emotions we consider 'negative' like anger but applies just as much to the 'positive' emotions like elation.

Why is this?

It's simply because we have not realized or accepted the moment has passed. We desire to stay there even if we feel it is hurtful.

All conditions, without exception, have the quality of impermanence. And it is within impermanence that we may take comfort as well.

We may consider impermanence as the 'toolbox' in which our emptions reside. When we need joy we reach into our emotional toolbox and use 'joy'. When we are finished, we simply put it back for future use.

But some toolboxes don't get replaced. Instead the tool, or emotion in this case, stays with the person, much like a toolbelt. After awhile the toolbelt gets full, cumbersome to carry, and noisy as we walk. We no longer need the hammer, but we choose to carry it anyway. 

In other words, we hold on to said 'emotion' too long and it becomes counter productive to living in the moment appropriately, this emotion no longer serves to your advantage. We bring about suffering by attachment. 

Now we may ask how long is a moment. A moment certainly is not a decade, a year, a even a month. To some degree, this depends on the individual circumstance. The death of a dear loved one or a birth may last a week or so. However a graduation may only last a few hours. Making the red light so you are not late to work may only last a few seconds.

It is important for each of us to be sure that we use our emotions appropriately and that we return them to our toolbox so that we do not end up carrying too much of a load in our daily lives. If we do, we end up risking our mental well-being because after all, you are much more than any single emotion.

  

Sathu. Sathu. Sathu.
 
Educate Your Mind With The Dharma.
 
**********************************************************************************************
Vladimir warmly and skillfully passes on the Buddhas Dharma to a world in need of loving-kindness, compassion, and empathy for the benefit of all living beings.
 
To learn more about us and for free mindfulness and mediation resources you are warmly invited to visit: www.bluelotusmeditation.us
 
Looking for a way to help guide others? Become a Blue Lotus Aspirant here: https://bluelotusmeditation.us/continue-your-journey
 
US Tax deductible donations may be offered here: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=88BRNH3K7Y7FQ
 
Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a 501(c)(3) Buddhist society.

What I Learned About Being a Vegetation and Buddhism

I enjoy reading the advice columns from time to time while I enjoy my coffee in the morning. And every now and them I come across an article where a vegetarian faces some conflict where the host serves a meat based dish. This situation can, and often does, lead to some from of disagreement between the family, host, and guest.

I will tell you my experiences for your consideration. 

For many years I have been vegetarian, borderline vegan, as well as a devout Buddhist. This never posed a problem for me even eating out at a steakhouse with friends, after all there are typically fries, blooming onions, and such on the menu. As a Buddhist I am very aware of the suffering this animal went through as it was being slaughtered. 

However, where I would often encounter my dilemma would be when we would be invited to another persons home and I would be offered a meat based dish. Deep down I know our host went through a lot of effort in preparation and presentation and to see disappointment in their eyes when I would inform them of my vegetarianism was saddening. On these occasions the host would graciously prepare something else so that I too could partake, but the mood was not the same.

Even through all of my experiences witnessing monks eating meat I had a hard time reconciling what to do. Also drawing upon my experiences I know that monks are not allowed to refuse any offering given by laity, including meat based dishes. In fact, Buddha ate meat. Even with his infinite compassion there is a reason for this action.

The Buddha understood this and established rules for monks when it comes time to eating meat. First, the animal was not to be slaughtered especially for them. Second, there are several animal species that may not be eaten like elephants, dogs, lions,...

People want to give and they give what they can. People give because thy know that generosity is it's own reward. People give to the monks out of respect for their path. Monks give up the homelife in order to better the world through meditation and dharma teachings. People give to generate positive karma and earn merit for a better next life. If a monk were to refuse an offering this action would promote suffering for both the giver and recipient. 

This was made so very obvious to me during my last visit to Cambodia. We travelled to many peoples homes, wealthy and poor alike, and each time we were offered meat based dishes. To turn away their generosity would hurt their feelings, which is suffering. Promoting suffering is not nurturing compassion and empathy towards others and is the opposite of the meaning of Buddhism.

So where do I stand now? What are my views towards being a vegetarian?

All of the Buddhas teachings are promoting the 'middle way'. Not living in either extreme of indulgence or deprivation. 

As such, at home or when I go out to a restaurant I do not order meat based dishes. However when I am invited into another's home I do not refuse what is being offered. In doing so, I promote good feelings with the host and those around me which helps ease suffering in the world.

And easing suffering is a step towards liberation.

Sathu. Sathu. Sathu.

 

Educate Your Mind With The Dharma.

 

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Vladimir warmly and skillfully passes on the Buddhas Dharma to a world in need of loving-kindness, compassion, and empathy for the benefit of all living beings.

 

To learn more about us and for free mindfulness and mediation resources you are warmly invited to visit: www.bluelotusmeditation.us

 

Looking for a way to help guide others? Become a Blue Lotus Aspirant here: https://bluelotusmeditation.us/continue-your-journey

 

US Tax deductible donations may be offered here: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=88BRNH3K7Y7FQ

 

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a 501(c)(3) Buddhist society.

The Benefits of Incorporating the Buddhist Five Precepts Into Your Life

Our world is troubled and as a result you probably live a troubled life as well. Not necessarily troubled as in entirely anxiety ridden to the point of not leaving your home, although this may be your situation. But more so troubled in the sense that you find fault in many situations, especially ones you have nothing to do with or you live with a sense of general unease. Or perhaps you're simply looking for more meaning in your life and want ot live it more wholesomely.

You most certainly wouldn't be alone in that sense.

The Five Precepts in Buddhism are foundational ethical guidelines that promote personal well-being, harmony with others, and a more peaceful society. While rooted in spiritual tradition, they are remarkably practical, offering clear benefits for anyone, regardless of religious affiliation, seeking a more mindful, ethical, and balanced life.

In doing so, incorporating the Five Precepts isn’t about perfection, it’s about intention and growth. Even small steps toward these ethical ideals can create a ripple effect: more emotional balance, stronger relationships, and a more compassionate presence in the world. You don’t have to be Buddhist to benefit; you only need a desire to live with more integrity and awareness.

1. Refrain from Killing

The first precept encourages respect for all forms of life. On a personal level, it nurtures compassion and reduces aggression. When you consciously avoid harming others, even insects or animals, you begin to cultivate empathy and patience. Over time, this promotes inner peace and fosters healthier relationships, since a nonviolent mindset tends to radiate calm and care toward people as well.

• What to do: Practice kindness toward all living beings, including insects, pets, and strangers.
• How it looks daily: Gently escort a spider out instead of squashing it. Choose plant-based meals more often. Support causes that protect life (like environmental or animal welfare efforts).
• Inner impact: Fosters empathy and a deeper sense of interconnectedness.

2. Refrain from Stealing

This precept goes beyond just avoiding theft. It teaches contentment and integrity. By not taking what isn't freely given, you develop a sense of trustworthiness and gratitude. In practice, this could mean resisting the urge to exploit others’ time, ideas, or emotional labor. As a result, your relationships become more genuine and grounded in mutual respect.

• What to do: Be mindful of taking what hasn’t been freely offered, including time, attention, or resources.
• How it looks daily: Don’t take office supplies for personal use. Show up on time for meetings. Acknowledge when someone shares emotional labor or ideas.
• Inner impact: Strengthens trust and self-respect through honest, ethical behavior.

3. Refrain from Sexual Misconduct

Often misunderstood narrowly, this precept promotes respect and responsibility in all forms of intimacy. It encourages honesty and consideration in how we engage with others romantically or sexually. When practiced sincerely, it fosters trust, reduces conflict, and supports long-term emotional and relational stability.

• What to do: Approach all relationships with honesty, consent, and mutual care.
• How it looks daily: Communicate clearly with partners. Avoid flirting with someone in a committed relationship. Reflect before acting on impulse.
• Inner impact: Reduces emotional chaos and cultivates stable, trusting connections.

4. Refrain from False Speech

This precept is about truthfulness and mindful communication. Speaking honestly—and with kindness,  builds credibility and prevents misunderstandings. When you stop exaggerating, gossiping, or speaking out of anger, conversations become more meaningful and relationships grow deeper. It also leads to a clearer mind, unburdened by the stress of maintaining falsehoods.

• What to do: Speak truthfully, kindly, and with purpose.
• How it looks daily: Pause before speaking to ask: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? Avoid gossip at work. Own up to mistakes instead of deflecting.
• Inner impact: Builds integrity, deepens relationships, and quiets inner conflict.

5. Refrain from Intoxicants

This precept advocates for clarity of mind. It doesn’t necessarily require complete abstinence but invites you to reflect on how intoxicants (including alcohol, drugs, or even media overconsumption) affect your awareness and decisions. With a clearer mind, you’re better able to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively, leading to better choices and improved mental health.

• What to do: Be conscious of anything that clouds your mind, alcohol, drugs, even digital distractions.
• How it looks daily: Set intentional limits on screen time. Notice your motivation before having a drink, celebration or escape? Try a few sober days each week.
• Inner impact: Increases mental clarity, emotional stability, and self-control.

After living with these precepts for some time you being to see people and the world differently. But more importantly, you see begin to see yourself in a condition of unfolding. And after more time elapses you begin to see yourself blossoming. Others see this too and as such perhaps some of these benevolent qualities begin to unfold in them as well. 

Sathu. Sathu. Sathu.

 

Educate Your Mind With The Dharma.

 

**********************************************************************************************

Vladimir warmly and skillfully passes on the Buddhas Dharma to a world in need of loving-kindness, compassion, and empathy for the benefit of all living beings.

 

To learn more about us and for free mindfulness and mediation resources you are warmly invited to visit: www.bluelotusmeditation.us

 

Looking for a way to help guide others? Become a Blue Lotus Aspirant here: https://bluelotusmeditation.us/continue-your-journey

 

US Tax deductible donations may be offered here: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=88BRNH3K7Y7FQ

 

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a 501(c)(3) Buddhist society.

Buddhism and the Art of Patience

How often do you find yourself wanting to get to your destination in a rush. Or maybe you can’t wait to get out of a Friday afternoon meeting. Or you can smell delicious food almost done emanating from the oven.

Whatever the situation is where you find yourself being ‘impatient’ know that it’s root cause is the craving for a different sensual experience. Sensual here meaning pertaining to sensory responses.

In Buddhism is a foundational quality on the path to enlightenment. Known as kṣānti in Sanskrit, patience is one of the six perfections (pāramitās) that a practitioner must cultivate. More than the ability to wait calmly; it's the mindset to endure suffering, adversity, and even injustice without anger or resentment. Patience is a powerful tool for transforming how we relate to the world, helping us respond to challenges with wisdom rather than impulse.

The Buddha in his First Noble Truth reveals that suffering is an inherent part of life. From this understanding comes a deep encouragement to meet difficulties with a calm and open heart. The Dhammapada, the foundational text of Buddhism, teaches us: “Enduring patience is the highest austerity.” This doesn’t suggest passive resignation, but rather an active, mindful acceptance that allows us to pause and reflect before reacting. Through patience, one cultivates the clarity to see things as they are, unclouded by anger or frustration.

Meditation plays a key role in developing patience. Sitting with one’s thoughts, discomfort, or restlessness without judgment builds resilience. Each moment we choose not to flee from discomfort, we strengthen our capacity for patience. As practitioners encounter distractions or bodily discomfort during meditation, the invitation is to observe without reacting. Over time, this practice extends beyond the cushion, into conversations, traffic jams, and life’s bigger upheavals.

Ultimately, Buddhism teaches that patience is an expression of compassion, for us and others. It allows space for healing, growth, and deeper understanding. When we are patient, we’re not suppressing emotions but creating room for skillful responses. It’s a slow but transformative path, one that nurtures inner peace and supports harmonious relationships. 

In a world that prizes speed and instant gratification, Buddhist patience is a necessity for cultivating wisdom.

Sathu. Sathu. Sathu.

 

Educate Your Mind With The Dharma.

 

**********************************************************************************************

Vladimir warmly and skillfully passes on the Buddhas Dharma to a world in need of loving-kindness, compassion, and empathy for the benefit of all living beings.

 

To learn more about us and for free mindfulness and mediation resources you are warmly invited to visit: www.bluelotusmeditation.us

 

Looking for a way to help guide others? Become a Blue Lotus Aspirant here: https://bluelotusmeditation.us/continue-your-journey

 

US Tax deductible donations may be offered here: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=88BRNH3K7Y7FQ

 

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a 501(c)(3) Buddhist society.

Exploring Mindfulness For Teens

Being a teen in this day and age is much different than when your parents were your age. I'm sure you've heard this before. This same sentiment was certainly felt when your grandparents talked to your parents as well about most of the same concerns. If you choose to have children, these same feelings and sentiments will be expressed to them. It's a normal cycle from parent to child. 

But for now, let's explore mindfulness today and how it will benefit your current as well as your future wellbeing. Your thoughts and concerns about so many changes and new experiences may all seem overwhelming. So as you read this know that this time, right now is all about you, your relationship with your parents, teachers, friends, the future, and the most important relationship you’ll ever have: with yourself.

So many aspects of your life are at a point where they may feel like they just want to burst out. This is normal. Our bodies experience many different sensations that are a result of our brains releasing different hormones into our system. This may, at times even manifest itself in an uncomfortable physical sensation. 

Sometimes, depending on the intensity of the sensation our mind may construct some type of story which oftentimes isn't true. We may feel overly sensitive to some from of rejection when there was no intended malice. Before we respond, we need to mindfully examine the situation for what is is and not what we 'think' it is. 

So when we experience these uncomfortable sensations it is important to recognize these conditions in the moment so we may bring mindful awareness to them. Remember, being mindful is also being non-judgmental towards having those feelings.

As a teen I'm sure you have many different types of relationships, but how do you walk a wholesome path with your relationships? 

How do your peers feel? Your peers have the exact questions as you and are experiencing the same feelings of uncertainty you are, although they may express it differently.

Some common questions you may have are:

    - Do my friends like me? Sure, they're your friends!

    - What will I do after high school? Does it truly matter? I promise you it doesn't but what does matter is how kind you are. That's what people will remember.

    - Are you the class clown? This 'hey, look at me' suggests that one is desiring affirmation or some form of positive reinforcement from a bad behavior. A sarcastic remark perhaps?

    - Social media presence. Keep it 'G - Rated'. There was an old saying during World War II that went 'loose lips, sink ships'. You don't want that sinking ship to be yours next week, next year, or five-years from know. Besides, you shouldn't be doing hurtful things anyway, right?

    - Parents. Yes, they love you and yes, they're proud of you. Sometimes parents get mad at you because of 'their' expectations for you. It's an extension of their world view that doesn't necessarily align with yours. Be cool about it and simply bring awareness to the fact that they don't want to see you hurt.

    -Teachers. This is a hard job, no question about it. Imagine you coming into work each day and seeing probably over 100 different people each with their own unique personality and needs going through life changes. Not to mention teachers are people too that are also dealing with sometimes stressful life events. Be empathetic and compassion towards them. 'After' you graduate recall a few of the good ones and friend them on Facebook (old people don't use Snapchat) and keep in contact with them. Knowing they made a positive difference in a students life is truly why they're in the profession.

    - Yourself. You will always have you. The face in the mirror will change as you get older but your essences will always be 'you'. Long after your body has ceased to exist, your conscience will always be there. Do good and engage in kind actions in this life so that you have a better future in this life and the next.

As you begin to experience more situations it’s important to start now to develop the necessary skills to mindfully address not only adversity and disappointment but overwhelming joy and good times as well. Both circumstances can lead to additional suffering if not viewed appropriately.

How can too much joy cause suffering?

When either side of our emotional state is out of balance suffering occurs but when we are too overjoyed for too log we develop an emboldened ego. This leads to feelings of superiority which may lead to risk taking behavior.

You will make mistakes along the way, we all do, including adults, and the mistakes we make aren’t the problem. It’s living in them long after they have occurred. Learning to let go of guilt and shame are liberating and allow you to experience life in a more wholesome way. Learning to let go also holds true to those who may have hurt you.

So how can you, as a teen, begin mindfulness practice?

Meditation is certainly involved in the process but even before you begin this truly search your feelings before you speak or engage in an action. Ask yourself, is it wholesome?

Be certain to help others. Look at service activities at your school (homeless, food pantry, relief funds). Being of service to others develops empathy and compassion and lets go of greed and callousness.

Do your best to try and not wish away your life. Statements like 'I can’t wait until I get my drivers license, or go off to college' take you out of the present moment. Being mindful is about being in the present moment, not the future nor the past.

Apologize first, no matter what the offense. This offers grace and compassion to both of you.

Use kind speech and don’t be sarcastic. The humor wears out quickly and is unappealing even when people laugh.

And last but not least, join our teen sangha - it’s free Wednesdays at 3:30 PM CST. It's important to have a mindful community to help you along.

Wishing you continued peace and wellbeing,

 

Vladimir

 

You are warmly invited to follow on us on Facebook and Instagram at @bluelotuscenter for more ways to improve your mindfulness practice and wellbeing.

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.

Website and monthly newsletter: www.bluelotusmeditation.us

For guided meditations and Dharma talks, please visit and subscribe to our YouTube channel.

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Mindfulness As A Family Practice

Mindfulness and meditation isn't a way of life that's about solitude or sequestering ourselves from others. In fact, it's very much the opposite. When we look at the purpose of mindfulness and meditation we see that it’s focus is on connections and the easing of suffering. Not only our suffering but others as well.

This inherent nature makes a mindfulness and meditation practice ideal for the family that will help strengthen this vital relationship.

Let's explore ways to include the family.

As is often the situation whenever there's a new aspect involving family it’s not uncommon that we find some resistance. This resistance is often true with teens but may present itself in anyone. As a mindful behavior we don’t force or shame anyone to try these practices.

Be the roll model. It's important to let others witness first hand the benefits that come from a mindfulness practice. But as a reminder, these benefits don't appear over night so be patent.

Here are some wonderful and readily available home examples:

• Let family members visible see you practice mindfulness
• Mindful walking
• Outside and in the home
• Journaling
• Cooking
• Eating
• Cleaning
• Driving
• Shopping
• Talking
• Laundry
• Even meditation

As you mindfully engage these activities invite someone to try any one of the above (or more) mindful actions. For the resistant family member you can even ask them mindful questions nonchalantly.

For example, if you're cutting a carrot for a salad ask them ‘where do you think this carrot came from’? Prompting them to go from the store all the way back to the farm.

Follow up by asking ‘how do you think the body will react to receiving the nourishment from the carrot’?

Continue by asking ask them to cut the carrot, if they’re old enough, and have them describe how it feels to slice it. Is it easy or hard? Is the fragrance pleasing? What about the texture and color?

Like all new ‘habits’ mindfulness may take some time to nurture and to come into its own, and that's OK. Our bad habits are the result of the constant bombardment of our worlds distractions and negativity and wont dissolve in a matter of weeks even. Give it time. Be patient. 

As you slowly progress feel confident in knowing that your family is growing and unfolding from one that was distracted to one that is blossoming.

And as a reminder to you below are only some of the positive outcomes of your families new journey.

Benefits of a family mindfulness practice:

• A more nurturing family relationship
• No yelling or arguing
• Trusting
• Quality time instead of ‘busy’ time.
• Stronger outside relationships too
• Accepting of others
• Empathetic of others
• Compassionate towards others
• Improved grades for school age children

Wishing you continued peace and wellbeing,

 

Vladimir

 

You are warmly invited to follow on us on Facebook and Instagram at @bluelotuscenter for more ways to improve your mindfulness practice and wellbeing.

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.

Website and monthly newsletter: www.bluelotusmeditation.us

For guided meditations and Dharma talks, please visit and subscribe to our YouTube channel.

Facebook

Instagram