The Importance of Gratitude

Opening Our Hearts To Receive Joy

With Thanksgiving right around the corner, we often become more mindful of what we’ve been fortunate to have received, or not received, over the course of the year. We reflect on the trials and tribulations we’ve overcome, as well as fond memories formed, accomplishments and achievements, all the while rejoicing in being here, in the present moment. 

I would think that 2021 has been better than 2020 for most of us and that is something to be thankful for this year. Although we celebrate Thanksgiving with food, laughter, hugs, and affection, Thanksgiving contains a much deeper meaning.

As I write this I’m listening to My Life by The Beatles. It may sound like a sad song but if you listen to it it’s a beautiful reflection of ‘people and things that went before’. Everything in life changes, people, places, and memories will not remain the same. As a result of these changes, we reflect on the past with a certain nostalgia making it necessary to cultivate thankfulness for what we have received, even if it’s a memory of loss or hardship.

Although we may be grateful for someone holding open a door, letting us cut in line when we only have a few items, we truly recognize thankfulness when we overcome a situation where we were faced with the possibility of something precious taken from us. 

Overcoming these trying times with the support of family and friends, or even by yourself, is a wonderful accomplishment and illustrates the importance of being thankful, the essence of Thanksgiving.

Here are a few considerations you may be grateful for:

• Waking up this morning. Many won't and being alive is a wonderful gift.
• Clean air. You don't need to live on a mountain top or forest to appreciate a deep inhale and exhale.
• Clean water. You don't need to go to a well or river to drink. Fresh, clean water is right in your tap.
• Your clothing. Clothing is designed to protect you from the elements. No matter what you have on it's doing it's job and many do not have clothing as well.
• Shelter. You don't need a fancy home or even an apartment to be grateful for shelter. Shelter is anything that protects you from the elements, including a tent.
• Food. If you ate last night, you were more fortunate than many others.  

As you cultivate gratitude for what you have now, you may also bring mindful awareness to where you may be tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. When you have gratitude for what you have in the present moment you will ring this joy with you into all that you may have and experience in the future.

For it is when we are thankful that we are more open to compassion and forgiveness to ourselves and to others. So, as you begin to reflect this season, offer yourself compassion and forgiveness and reach out to those who may be hurting. Your caring voice may be the only one they hear and as a result maybe a bountiful cornucopia of blessings spring forward towards you both.

Wishing you all a joyful Thanksgiving,

Vladimir

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.

Ten Signs Your Wellbeing Is Off Balance - Part 2

Welcome back my friends. 

Have you had the opportunity to consider the first five signs from our last post? What did you think?

Now we'll consider there remaining five signs you're off balance.

You’re short tempered
Short temperedness is a strong sign of imbalance and can find itself in the company of someone with an immature social-emotional level.

Short temperedness lies with someone who expects perfection in time and deed which we know is an impossible standard as well as wanting to control the actions of others. 

Consider ow much of our valuable time do we spend planning every single detail of every event, or being disappointed at someone else behavior. 

To avert the long-term dangers of being short tempered one should, with all sincerity, learn to let go of the idea of perfection and enjoy the feeling of unburdening.

You don’t enjoy alone time
Why are you uncomfortable with yourself? Is it too quiet in your home, and you find this unnerving? This is a sign of an overactive (out of balance) mind that desires the need to continuously have stimuli. A calm lake doesn't need to have waves in order to be happy with itself. Like the body, the mind needs to relax, and you need to be yourself.

You don’t like people   

Humans are social animals and societies have evolved around this organization for safety and community. Saying you ‘don’t’ like people is an overgeneralization. This limiting mindset often originates from either a fear of yourself not belonging to a group or the inability to allow yourself to experience with openness the good people truly have to offer. Both circumstances shield you from wonderful experiences due to you holding unrealistic expectations of others as well as not having an openness towards the beauty of people.

Too much entertainment
This is a form of escapism where one turns to diversionary activities like reading, TV, video games, music to avoid knowing and perhaps dealing with emotions or feelings in an honest way.

Do we all need to take a break at times? Sure, we do and in doing so it allows us to unwind mentally and physically. But escapism in some sense can lead to procrastination towards important tasks.

You’re always on the go
This too is a form of escapism and can be a sign of dissatisfaction at home. Home in this sense isn’t necessarily where you sleep, it’s you and your inner being. Being constantly busy is living in the future and not in the present moment. You are planning your next 'adventure'. The ‘always on the go’ is exhausting and depleting of your energy as you look for the next distraction.  

That concludes our ten signs but remember, this isn't to say that just because you experience one or more of these signs at one time or another you will stay there. As with everything in existence, emotions will arise, exist for a time, and then dissipate.

So when one of these signs does arise, recognize it, sit with it for  time, and then let it go.   

I wish you peace and ease,

Vladimir

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.

Ten Signs Your Wellbeing Is Off Balance - Part 1

Recognizing Signs Of Our Own Suffering

Our mental wellbeing is so very vital to happiness in all aspects of our lives. It's important to notice when we're starting to become off balance and then to take the kind and compassionate steps to return to balance.

And as we work towards a more balanced lifestyle with mindfulness we need to be aware as to when our well-being is in jeopardy. It takes mindful practice to notice when these feelings begin arise and it certainly takes practice to understand their true origins or why we feel them in the first place.

In this post I'll identify the first five and conclude with the remaining five in our next post.

There can be significant overlap when we experience these feelings and behaviors thus they are presented in no particular order.

1. You're Opinionated
2. You're Controlling
3. You Minimize
4. You Catastrophize
5. You're Sarcastic

You're opinionated

We all have our likes and dislikes but is it necessary to express them? No. Most often ‘opinions’ are really complaints. For example: do you prefer strawberries or pears? That would be an opinion. The complaint could be: ‘I hate strawberries because the seeds get caught in my teeth’.

The first example is merely an opinion which is certainly up to an individual. The complaint about the seeds in your teeth, although a valid consideration, is a negative emotion. Watering negativity in this manner promotes more negativity which is mentally unhealthy.

You’re controlling
Your expectations are unrealistic. Trying to control or manipulate the smallest detail is not possible and in doing so you miss out on all of the joy that life has to offer. Always looking for something out of place or telling others how to behave is exhausting, physically and mentally. 

Learn to let go and accept that people will make mistakes and plans are really only suggestions and not certain. 

          
You minimize
Somethings are a ‘big deal’ and feelings are certainly one of them. If someone tells you that you hurt their feelings and your response is ‘ toughen up’ or ‘get thicker skin’ you are minimizing the validity of their feeling with your speech. When you minimize someone else you are, in-fact, also minimizing your well-being by nurturing callousness towards others.

Accept what they say as truthful and apologize.

 
You catastrophize
One the opposite side of minimization is catastrophizing behavior. Assuming that the worst will happen is watering negativity. For example: you divorce/separate/break up from a long-term partner and you think ‘I’ll never find anyone to love me’. 

 
You know this statement isn’t true and even though it may by hyperbole to some extent you’re still nurturing negativity towards yourself. So why put forth the energy towards these statements.

You’re sarcastic
Sarcasm is extreamly detrimental to one’s well-being and is an  attempt to mask pain, hurt, or disappointment with humor. It’s also a scream for affirmation and acceptance. We see this a lot on TV and movies and it has become so commonplace that society views it as normal but in actuality waters feelings of sadness and unworthiness.

  

Until our next post I invite you to journal each time you notice these feelings or behaviors beginning to surface. At the end of the week count these occurrences and see if you begin to notice a pattern.

 

I wish you peace and ease,

Vladimir

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.