Ten Signs Your Wellbeing Is Off Balance - Part 1

Recognizing Signs Of Our Own Suffering

Our mental wellbeing is so very vital to happiness in all aspects of our lives. It's important to notice when we're starting to become off balance and then to take the kind and compassionate steps to return to balance.

And as we work towards a more balanced lifestyle with mindfulness we need to be aware as to when our well-being is in jeopardy. It takes mindful practice to notice when these feelings begin arise and it certainly takes practice to understand their true origins or why we feel them in the first place.

In this post I'll identify the first five and conclude with the remaining five in our next post.

There can be significant overlap when we experience these feelings and behaviors thus they are presented in no particular order.

1. You're Opinionated
2. You're Controlling
3. You Minimize
4. You Catastrophize
5. You're Sarcastic

You're opinionated

We all have our likes and dislikes but is it necessary to express them? No. Most often ‘opinions’ are really complaints. For example: do you prefer strawberries or pears? That would be an opinion. The complaint could be: ‘I hate strawberries because the seeds get caught in my teeth’.

The first example is merely an opinion which is certainly up to an individual. The complaint about the seeds in your teeth, although a valid consideration, is a negative emotion. Watering negativity in this manner promotes more negativity which is mentally unhealthy.

You’re controlling
Your expectations are unrealistic. Trying to control or manipulate the smallest detail is not possible and in doing so you miss out on all of the joy that life has to offer. Always looking for something out of place or telling others how to behave is exhausting, physically and mentally. 

Learn to let go and accept that people will make mistakes and plans are really only suggestions and not certain. 

          
You minimize
Somethings are a ‘big deal’ and feelings are certainly one of them. If someone tells you that you hurt their feelings and your response is ‘ toughen up’ or ‘get thicker skin’ you are minimizing the validity of their feeling with your speech. When you minimize someone else you are, in-fact, also minimizing your well-being by nurturing callousness towards others.

Accept what they say as truthful and apologize.

 
You catastrophize
One the opposite side of minimization is catastrophizing behavior. Assuming that the worst will happen is watering negativity. For example: you divorce/separate/break up from a long-term partner and you think ‘I’ll never find anyone to love me’. 

 
You know this statement isn’t true and even though it may by hyperbole to some extent you’re still nurturing negativity towards yourself. So why put forth the energy towards these statements.

You’re sarcastic
Sarcasm is extreamly detrimental to one’s well-being and is an  attempt to mask pain, hurt, or disappointment with humor. It’s also a scream for affirmation and acceptance. We see this a lot on TV and movies and it has become so commonplace that society views it as normal but in actuality waters feelings of sadness and unworthiness.

  

Until our next post I invite you to journal each time you notice these feelings or behaviors beginning to surface. At the end of the week count these occurrences and see if you begin to notice a pattern.

 

I wish you peace and ease,

Vladimir

Blue Lotus Meditation and Mindfulness Center is a registered 501(c)(3) religious organization.